Harry Potter and the Teporarily Insane Authour
by SiLvEr-ReFlEcTiOnS
Summary: MY FIRST FANFIC, hopefully will make you giggle or snort or whatever. I can’t write summaries.
1. The legendry chapter of first

Note from SiLvEr: Hi every one this is my first fanfic, review and tell me if it sucks. Make some suggestions if you want.

Summary: MY FIRST FANFIC, hopefully will make you giggle or snort or whatever. I can't write summaries. But it does inclued the author desks and capital letters.

Rating: T, just to be safe…

Disclaimer: I f you think I own Harry Potter you SERIOUSLY need therapy…

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**_Harry Potter_ **

_**And**_

_**The Temporarily **_

_**Insane Author**_

_The Fabled Chapter of First. _

Now as you have probably guessed from the title this story is about Harry Potter and his many adventures with his friend and maybe SiLvEr. I cooked up this tale of humor for numerous reasons; actually I was bored as hell and sugar high…

… It's a pity this story isn't about artichokes they're more interesting…

ANYWAY 

One day (or night who gives a damn?) Harry was sitting in his room thinking about how disturbed his life was when Ron appeared and started to smash his head on Harry's desk.

Wow, thought Harry while looking in the back of a spoon, I really do have a scar shaped like a lightning bolt!

"YOU IDIOT,"screamed Ron who for some reason could read Harry's mind " THAT'S NOT RELEVENT TO THE STORY!"

" Sure it is," said Harry who was slightly confused as to why Ron could read his thoughts " All this time I thought it was teapot shaped"

" YOU RETARD " screamed Ron

" Why are you constantly screaming and talking in caps-lock Ron? " asked Harry calmly.

" BECAUSE SiLvEr IS MAKING ME YOU BASTERD!"

" You sick … METAL KITCHEN APPLIENCES THAT ARE WAY OVER PRICED!" Harry yelled at SiLvEr.

And with that Ron died, because I said so.

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So guys what did you think review and tell me if its crap I won't get offended, unless you're being REALLY cruel. Love SiLvEr-ReFlEcTiOnS xxoo 


	2. The chapter of twoishness

Note from SiLvEr: Hi every one this is my first fanfic, review and tell me if it sucks. Make some suggestions if you want. Thanks to all who reviewed if you scroll down I'll give you a dishwasher…

Summary: MY FIRST FANFIC, hopefully will make you giggle or snort or whatever. I can't write summaries.

Rating: T, just to be safe…

Disclaimer: I f you think I own Harry Potter you SERIOUSLY need therapy…

* * *

_Harry Potter_

_And_

_**The Temporarily**_

_Insane Author_

The Chapter of Twoishness 

After the horrendous calamity in his bedroom Harry jumped on his llama, Shelldon, and rode all the way to Hogwarts.

"Up and away!" Harry yelled.

At Hogwarts he met Hermione and Ron, Ron who had previously died in the first chapter is now obviously alive.

" Harry," exclaimed Hermione," Your scar is shaped like a lightning bolt! All this time I thought it was shaped like a teapot"

Harry: …

" Hello!" said Draco, sliding out of the shadows

"DRACO!" yelled Harry "what are you doing sliding out of shadows suspiciously!"

" I think it's sexy" said Draco sliding back into the shadows.

Harry: …

" Harry if you say '…' one more time I will beat you with this object I found on the ground, actually I think it's a vacuum cleaner handle !" Ron said raising his voice slightly so it was a feeble scream but not.

" Now, now", said SiLvEr, " No need for violence boys"

Harry: …

" Right that's it!" said Ron in his feeble screaming voice and beat Harry with the vacuum cleaner handle until his non-teapot-shaped scar bled. Then Ron died. Because I said so.

" Harry," cried Draco, sliding out of the exact same shadow he slid out of before " Want to go have kinky steamy gay sex in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom for all the horny citizens of fanfiction?"

"Sure," said Harry jumping on Draco " but wtf is a fanfiction?"

" I have no idea"

Hermione: …

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Thanks to all those people who reviewed my first chappie, love you throws dishwashers to all and to those who didn't those who didn't…

We'll see…

Love SiLvEr-ReFlEcTiOnS. xxoo

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Beta's Note: Go Son! I love that gay sex! Who doesn't?

Love only-harry


	3. The Mighty Chapter after Twoishness

**Note from SiLvEr: Hi every one this is my first fanfic, review and tell me if it sucks. Make some suggestions if you want.**

**Summary: MY FIRST FANFIC, hopefully will make you giggle or snort or whatever. I can't write summaries.**

**Rating: T, just to be safe…**

**Disclaimer: I f you think I own Harry Potter you SERIOUSLY need therapy…**

* * *

_**Harry Potter**_

_**And**_

_**The Temporarily **_

_**Insane Author**_

**__**

_The Quest for the mighty number of chapters after twoishness_

SiLvEr sat in an over-stuffed armchair (wtf sort of description is that?) in the Gryffindor common room, just then Harry emerged from the boy's dormitory.

SiLvEr tried to stand and get up out of her over-stuffed armchair but failed miserably and collapsed in a giggling heap.

" AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!", screamed Harry. "Over-stuffed armchairs!" And jumped out the window.

At that moment Ron died, because I said so, and Lupin burst into the room wearing nothing but a banana-cream pie.

"Please help," yelled Lupin. "Make them stop! I'm allergic to banana-cream pie!"

And he threw himself out the window.

SiLvEr: …

"Oh no you don't!" yelled Ron who was suddenly alive again. He proceeded to try to thrust two identical potatoes into SiLvEr's nostrils while simultaneously tuning his radio.

SiLvEr, who is the author, was smart enough to write that at this point in the story Ron died again, because I said so.

" ARGH!", screamed Hermione, "My perfect man is dead, AGAIN!" and followed Harry and Lupin in throwing herself out the window.

"I like teapots" said Harry.

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Thanks for so many reviews I love all the people who have been giving me support, now I give you more white goods! Toasters for all! and to the rest of you… I'll let you know when I come up with a good thing to do to you…

Love SiLvEr-ReFlEcTiOnS. xx

Beta's Note: Ah, but don't we all.


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